The natural history of deer, as explained by a 4-year-old

“I want a pet deer. I’ll keep it in the back yard, and when it grows up it will have antlers.

“Baby deers have antlers on the inside. And every time they cry, their antlers grow a little. Every time they grow, they make a little poke, and they have a boo-boo. But then it heals up.

“When grownup deers die, their antlers apparently fall off.

“Mom, how are baby deers born?”

(They grow inside their mama’s belly, just like you did.)

“But deers don’t have a crotch!”

(Sure they do.)

“You mean they have two crotches?”

(No, just one between their back legs. Their front legs are like arms. You don’t have a crotch in your chest, do you?)


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